tunia

When I was in sixth grade. I studied in "Rajmata Krishna Kumari Girls Public School" (RKKGPS) it was this school owned by the king of Jodhpur (yeah they still exist!) Loved being there for a year. One of the best year of my life. It was a day boarding school, the class strength was not allowed to exceed 20! So we'd all get personal attention. But how the head of the institute manage to know us all, still beats me!

A month before the distribution of the annual reports, Mrs. Brar(the head) would start collect the report cards and write comments about the students in each one of them. Mine read " Has leadership qualities, always smiling!" I want to go 9yrs back and turn into the same Ira. The one who was carefree, her favourite quote being " Live Life To The Fullest". She took each day at a time, was confident and in control of the things going on in her life, very frank and straight forward.

Where did I lose myself? Was it between all those switching of schools and trying to adjust in a new back ground every alternate year? or The gruelling competitive exams? or Joining college and taking my first steps into the real world? Things seem to be going wayward. Every time I try and get things back into track, something triggers the negetive feelings stored in my mind. This constant minor depression lingers over me all day, I tried finding sollutions and working them as well but none seem to help.
TWO LOST SOULD SWIMMING IN A FISHBOWL
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tunia

Oh god oh god oh god!
Every time I have exams. I end up wondering if I made the right choice by taking up the courses that I am persuing. When I am done with them, I am sure I made the right choice!! But why every time? This is one big problem with me. I am always not sure about the choices that I make. At the time I make them, like I wanted to buy a liner. Thought I'd check out the brush before buying. Made up my mind completely before leavin, at the store. I wasn't sure what kind of brush was I looking for?
When I go out to buy clothes, I am fascinated by the stuff there (I'd already decided what I needed to get! before coming) and completely completely go off track. End up buyin stuff that I wore for the first and the last time right there in the trial room! I am so bad at makin decisions!
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