Fear, fear itself. My remarkably realistic mother always taught me this. Yet, I developed incomprehensible fears along the years.

I fear climbing stairs and even more so, climbing down them. Even slopes. I get an uncertain feeling all through the process, with the bottom of my feet feeling ticklish, like you do while swinging high on a swing. In that case your feet are off the ground, this is different and weird. I am always afraid of slipping off. My knees feel weak and uncertain.

I decided to know more about my phobia and found out that it is a common problem disconcerting scores of people across the world. Fear of stairs is created by the unconscious mind as a protective mechanism, relating to some trauma from the past. I do not recollect any such formidable incident relating stairs and my past.

There are actually two kinds of stair-related 'phobias: bathmophobia (fear of stairs or steep slopes) and climacophobia (fear of stairs, climbing, or of falling downstairs). I can not decide which category I fall in. Probably both since I fear stairs and slopes and also I fear climbing down or falling off them.

Each time I climb down an intimidating flight of stairs, I fear the worst. This makes me very uncomfortable, daunting me from carrying out simple daily chores normally. I have tried keeping my mind off these thoughts and to overcome my fear. Someday, I hope to intrepidly walk down stairs and run down a slope!
caboodle mix :: , 18 reflections | edit post

My first day in office. This is just an eight weeks intern, even still I woke up with butterflies in my stomach! Got my office bag ready, which got quite stuffed. * "I might need this!" , "I might need this too!" ! * Wore something suave and comfortable, considering the sereing whether and the first impression on my boss! Prayed to god before leaving as my mother smeared my forehead with Holy Ash .

I was just about to leave when it started raining cats and dogs. I wanted to struggle my way to office by travelling in public transport * An abscure inexplicable notion in my head about savoring things more by earning them the hard way! *. Well, driving down on my own had to do, which was a nice one and a half hour's travel. All attempts of keeping self dry were defeated by the half a mile walk from the parking till my office * I like saying, " My Office" *!

Somehow struggled into the compound. I was doused, but my spirits were still high. A visit to the rest room and dabbing myself with countless tissues helped gain back composure (exterior).

I had to get my identification card made, without which I could enter the premises but would not be allowed inside the office! It required for me to submit a photograph and my details with proof. Darn! Something just had to go wrong. "Oh! No! wait, I got a photograph! and a copy of my PAN Card." See, stuffing that office bag did help afterall!

Nothing very productive done at the work front, just familiarising with work and the place. Spent time at the office library too! My favourite place in the building. Looking forward to tomorrow.

Tell me about your first days??
caboodle mix :: , , 8 reflections | edit post

Just got over with my exams which seemed to have been going on for ever! Well now I am free! Have a list of movies to catch up with! Got three days, after which my interns start. * groan *

I have to reload my ipod since I am extremely bored of the present collection. Have to keep myself pepped up while am in office! :) I had been going for my exams with a friend, loved his pool of music. Had asked him to load my ipod, but he keeps forgetting. Now its time to go home!

All my friends from hostel left today. I have another year to go before college finishes. Life is going to be so much different without them. Everything from getting up in the morning, to eating, going out to sleeping, we did together! I am gonna try and make the best of things. Afterall we will stay in touch. I am going to miss them crazy though! :) I love them so much! Anywhere felt like home with them!

Just got back from farewell lunch! Got drunk like crazy last to last night! Clasped onto my stomach and rolled on the floor laughing, looking at the videos! (literally) Thank god! one of us decided to remain sober, just in case!! :D

Had an insane bout of crying, laughing crying ........ for over an hour last night! Again, could not stop laughing, looking at the videos! Is this what being hysterical is?! I guess its easier not to think about whats going to happen. It is bound to happen anyways, right?

Anant is coming tomorrow, have loads to plan.
caboodle mix :: , , 7 reflections | edit post